February 2012
6 posts
1 tag
Don't look down!
Week 19.
I’m still feeling pretty amazing. In fact, this week, while making breakfast and lunch one morning I commented to Dan, “I don’t even feel pregnant!” “Well, don’t look down then,” was his response. We both got a good chuckle out of it. It’s true, I don’t feel pregnant most of the time. I mostly feel pregnant when I try to bend...
Week 18
Jenny decided it was her turn to make a cameo in the weekly pictures.
Poppy has been kicking up a storm, I can feel more and more kicks everyday. Dan felt him/her kick once Friday night. It’s such an amazing, reassuring feeling!
-Kristen
"I Like Myself!"
There is research out there saying that a child in the womb can hear a song and will remember that song one to two months after birth if sung everyday. I can’t sing. So, instead I’m reading “I Like Myself!” by Karen Beaumont and illustrated by David Catrow (my favorite illustrator) every night to Poppy. I read to the baby now because he/she can only hear my voice. Dan and...
Registering
We have officially registered at Babies R Us and went to Pottery Barn Kids today in Richmond to look at bedding and cribs. We have had the best time registering and preparing for our little Poppy.
One of the best things I did before going to register was research. Along with researching, I asked friends who are moms four important questions:
1. What did you register for that you LOVE?
2....
2 tags
January 2012
2 posts
2 tags
December 2011
1 post
The holidays hit early
About a week after we heard one strong healthy heartbeat I started to show. Wouldn’t you know, the first day I had to wear my pants unbuttoned someone would pat my belly and ask if I was pregnant! I was in shock and my face turned beat red. “No, I’ve just gained some weight from working here,” I lied. Then told her it was her fault, jokingly, because she was holding a packet of cookies. Later...
November 2011
3 posts
3 tags
Three incredible, life-altering words
Dear Friends:
To each of you out there, thank you. For every thought you spared us, for every prayer you whispered in the dark and in the stillness of your heart, for every hope you sent fluttering into the cosmos. Thank you.
Why? Because it worked. Kristen is pregnant! And we have the combination of your enthusiastic support, our fervent belief that it would happen and modern medicine to thank...
2 tags
3 tags
Team Shuman hits one out of the park
This post is laden with TMI, but honestly, you shouldn’t be surprised by that at this point. Consider yourself warned. … Again.
So you know from Kristen’s recent post that she went through IUI last month. The epilogue: Didn’t work.
Despite a mature egg and 27 million sperm, something went awry. It happens. With each IUI cycle, there’s at best a 30 percent chance of conception. Were we...
October 2011
1 post
Leaving it to a Higher Power
A few weeks ago during mass, I was moved by this verse from Matthew 18:19, “Again, I tell you that if two of you on earth agree about anything you ask for, it will be done for you by my Father in heaven.” I approached my priest after the service to speak with him about our infertility and how for more than three years at least two people have been praying for us to have a baby. His advice to me,...
September 2011
3 posts
4 tags
You want me to WHAT!?
Warning! This might be too much information for some: When I walked into the office today I noticed there were two other couples in the waiting room. After checking in at the front desk I was told to go upstairs to the second floor. I thought my IUI would take place upstairs because that’s where I had my hysteroscopy. So, I rode the elevator upstairs and walked to the location I was told. A woman...
3 tags
I feel like a pincushion
This month’s cycle was full of injections. I gave myself seven days worth of injections. I’ve started to bruise around my belly button from the shot sites, which makes my stomach sore. Last Sunday I also tried acupuncture with 14 very thin needles. I had a needle in each of my ears, one in the top of my head, seven around my belly button, one in each wrist, and one in each of my ankles. It didn’t...
1 tag
It's been a while
Oops. It’s been, er, quite a while since we updated you all. That’s mainly because there’s been little to report. After Kristen’s body declared marshal law and commandeered her ovaries, we took a little time to let things settle back to normal. We’d planned to start IUI (a.k.a., the turkey-baster technique) in August, but we scuppered that idea when we realized that doing so would have required...
August 2011
1 post
2 tags
Stuck
One of the books I have been using to help me better understand fertility and my body, Making Babies by Dr. Sami David and Jill Blakeway, uses a Western medicine approach to fertility. Within this book women and men determine their fertility type. My fertility type is: stuck. Defined as “The Stuck type is stressed out which stems from poor energy and blood flow throughout the body, or what is...
July 2011
3 posts
4 tags
Weird. That’s the only way to describe it.
I went to the doctor yesterday for my Day 2 ultrasound and blood work. My doctor took one look at my uterus and did not utter the usual “your have a beautiful uterus” in her beautiful Argentinean accent. Instead, she commented that my uterine lining was still thick and that I had a follicle in my left ovary that had not released yet, even though the follicles from my right ovary had released,...
4 tags
Emotionally connected
Watching the episode “Picking Up the Pieces” of Giuliana & Bill, I listened to what Giuliana had to say about her miscarriage. Even though I’ve never miscarried, I share so many of the same emotions and thoughts that she vocalized in the episode. I heard her say all the things that I have said or have thought about saying but haven’t spoken. One thing she said she worried was that her husband...
4 tags
Sublime Siblings
One of the reasons I want children is because I want to see first hand what it’s like to have a sibling. I’m an only child. Dan is one of three. I am mesmerized by the relationship he has with his brother and sister. They are beyond goofy and supportive of one another. One night while on vacation, I experienced the competitiveness between brothers. Dan and his brother were each driving separate...
June 2011
5 posts
Hi, I’m Kristen. I’m infertile.
I’ve joined an online support group. I love the anonymity of it. Throughout discussions, I have formed relationships with women who are also struggling with infertility. Sometimes it’s nice to hear a second opinion from people who are so supportive (but you’ve never met). They have either been through what I’m going through, are a few steps ahead, or are a few steps behind where we...
Am I ready for this?
I promised Dan to take it easy this first week of my summer break. So when my friend asked me to watch her two children for a night, I caved in to their sweetness. I’m a little overwhelmed by all their stuff, how they keep asking for more toys, and how busy they are. Our house is definitely NOT childproof. We have vases on low tables; camera gear easily accessible to small fingers and hands, and...
Spoon full of sugar
(If your name is Kathie, Judy, Rich or Bob, you might want to skip reading this post. You’ve been warned.)
Let’s be clear, this whole infertility thing is a pain in the arse. Not only are we having trouble doing something we’re built to do, there’s a seemingly endless stream of doctor’s appointments, medications and injections that make it feel like we’re stuck on a hamster wheel. It’s a...
The little engine that could
Giving myself injections again this month has made me realize this month is a new month, but again I’m still not pregnant. Dan has been so supportive and encouraging throughout this process. He helps me every night that he can with the injections, numbing my belly and chats with me while I stick myself. I can do the injections myself, but I love having the support. Because injections suck!
I love...
The good, the bad, and the next step
The good: I interviewed for a job I’ve been wanting for three years and got it! I’m going to be leaving my fifth grade classroom to be a reading specialist next year. I couldn’t be happier. After my three-hour interview (yes, three hours), I made the decision to choose a school that I feel like will be the best fit for me.
The bad: What am I not doing right? Clearly something is not working...
May 2011
7 posts
Waiting...
When Dan and I started this process we thought we would get pregnant with no problems and we’d be able to keep it a secret for the first trimester. In reality, we kept our infertility a secret for a little over two years. I feel anxious each month waiting until the day to take a pregnancy test. I feel anxious because I know so many people are rooting for us and curious about how we are doing....
We are happy for you
It’s funny how sometimes you can be truly elated for someone who’s able to accomplish something you want so badly. A friend gets a promotion in six months while you hold the same job for a few years, and you’re happy for them. Back when we swam, we were proud of our teammates who went faster than us.
Same goes for babies. We’ve been working on conceiving for close to three years. Sure, it’s been...
Too much of a good thing
After four days of Follistim injections, we went for an ultrasound Wednesday, only to find out that I had around eight to nine standard sized follicles growing. This was A LOT! The doctors dropped my injection dose, and I went back Friday for another ultrasound with blood work. Dr. Staudtmauer said, “We need to watch you closely”. Friday, she looked concerned as she saw five large follicles. This...
Tron was wrong about one thing
This whole infertility-treatment process takes on a sort of mechanistic life of its own at some points. It’s relentlessly marching forward, cogs turning and switches clicking, and we have to make the choice of whether to drive the machine or get dragged by it. Right now, we have the wheel.
Part of that control involves a dose of analysis from time to time. When you ride this thing through so many...
Shooting up in the parking lot
Yesterday morning, Dan and I had a Saturday appointment at the Jones Institute to have an ultrasound and blood drawn. They were checking my hormone levels to create a baseline for my Follistim injections. Once the blood work was done, the doctors knew how much to tell my to inject.
I was attending a wedding, so I was a little nervous about having to call the phone tree to get my specific dosage...
Special Delivery from the Pharmacy
Yesterday, when Mandell’s Pharmacy called to set up delivery of my prescriptions, I spoke with Landon. He was very jovial and helpful. At the end of our conversation he said to me, “I wish you the best of luck”. I was extremely appreciative of his comment and of course, got choked up.
This afternoon, I received my prescriptions by mail. The package contained a pre-filled syringe, syringe pen...
Sometime it’s easier to talk to celebrities
I was once asked if I relate more to celebrities or friends/family member who go through fertility problems. I’d have to say that I relate more to celebrity women, such as Guiliana & Bill, who went through IVF, and Rosie Pope on “Pregnant in Heels” when she described her infertility while trying to get pregnant for the second time. They go into detail, and you see their true emotions play out...
April 2011
4 posts
4 tags
Thinking about buying stock in Kleenex
I am not usually a very emotional person, but since taking fertility drugs, that has changed. I spent two hours crying at “The Biggest Loser” when Arthur was voted off, get choked up at commercials, and bust out in tears at any accident on the road involving emergency vehicles.
Here’s a recent example of that last one: On Saturday, while driving home from the grocery store, two fire engines and an...
All clear with my 20-year-old uterus
Is it good or bad that I am greeted by first name as I walk into the doctor’s office before signing in?
On the good side, the staff at Jones Institute is personable. I feel they truly care about us as a couple and want more than anything for us to get pregnant. On the bad side, I’ve been there over a year, and I still need help to conceive a child.
I’m going with good! I’m more optimistic now...
5 tags
I'll have what she's having ...
Kristen’s hysteroscopy yesterday went smoothly. She was predictably loopy under anesthesia (she randomly asked the doctor to give her “an ounce of caffeine in the IV,” in addition to confessing what she feared might happen while she was under) and woke up yammering about all the grading she had to get done before report cards go home in a few days. All in all, it was a hassle-free experience...
Let ‘em rip!
I’m scared I’m going to cut the cheese in my doctor’s face.
Let me explain.
While reviewing the x-rays from my hysterosalpingogram (HSG) back in January, my doctor noticed gray areas in the corners of my uterus. She concluded there could be polyps and said she wanted to investigate further if our latest attempt at conceiving with the help of an injection, hormone pills and progesterone gel...
March 2011
2 posts
Try not to think about it
Easier said than done. As a woman, how do you not think about something that is always on your mind and you want so badly? After all the drugs and procedures and bills, I am always thinking about what cycle day I’m on, what to eat, drink, when to have sex and how much to exercise in order to get pregnant. So, how do you not think about it? Don’t think about it and have fun, right? Oh, don’t worry....
6 tags
Welcome aboard! You might want to buckle up.
Hi! Thanks for checking out our blog. As you can tell from the little description above, this is where we’ll be talking about our battle with infertility and all the anxiety, hope, frustration, humor and love that entails. Don’t worry, we’ll keep it light. We hemmed and hawed for a while about doing this, about “going public” with our predicament, because of the general perception that this...